I guess this is the second of the series I started...
As an explanation beforehand since it's been a while since the previous! These are firmly and solely just what I feel about certain topics. Usually personal since I write better
I also prefer a more casual tone and blunt for the most part; I guess you could say that's my style c:
Alright! Shall we begin? And also, I'd like to please ask that to make sure there are no misunderstandings, that you read the whole thing before making a judgement! I'll try to make it as un-boring as possible ;D
Okay, this topic has mostly been a personal one because I have lost a number of friends online that I never intended to nor realized, to my fault, due to the fact I was becoming more 'known'. Although I know I haven't changed nor do I believe I've even become that well 'known'; it's come to my attention that this may not be how I'm viewed as.
I want to reassure everyone first and foremost, that I have not become a different person than who I was before and that throughout the two times I've experienced this 'popularity growth', per se, it hasn't done much to change the way I view anyone. The only change is that I realize I have the responsibility of making sure this is apparent.
I know many of the common problems and 'signs' that popularity has been unbecoming to someone are the following:
-Decrease in how much they talk to you if you'd known them before
-Unresponsive in comments or notes
-Leaving short comments that are absent of emotion
-Lack of acknowledgement
And I'm sure there are many more you could consider are symptoms of popularity, no?
Not in my defense, but as to clarify first and foremost. Although they might not realize themselves, the popular people are just. like. You.
Imagine logging in to an inbox with 50 messages a day. Or more. The least you get is maybe 20 full comments. Maybe 5 on days that you haven't submitted. I'm just going off of my personal statistics. But not everyone types at over 100 wpm and I'm sure we all have personal lives full of hw, work, maybe a social life of our own, stress here and there, and all in all, I'm sure we aren't all always the happiest of people no matter what the circumstances are. No one's perfect. I'm not. You aren't. But we should be happy we aren't because then we'd all be the same, no? All of us would be completely selfless, completely generous, always thinking of others. All of us multi-talented.
But life doesn't work that way! And that's the beauty of it. We all have our drawbacks. Whether it's personality or life situations. And maybe it's not always the case but I personally know the pressures of having to reply to everyone. Maybe not everyone feels that way, but everyone popular was once just 'another person' on the internet who browsed for websites like this and started an account for the fun of it. Maybe I'm wrong but I think we all can agree that this is how at least we began.
Now I want you to imagine though, again, to that cluttered inbox. But on top of that. Add in the extracurricular activities you might have if you do, add in school or job work- any other work! And then all other stress or just small displeasures you might've had recently. Would you really feel like replying to those 50 messages or to sort out owed artwork? Or even to talk to people who you either feel would not want to hear about it or just people you don't want to tell because you really don't want to give them the trouble either? Whatever your reasons are, I'm sure we've all had our days we don't feel like talking to anyone. And sometimes those days last longer than others. I don't believe there is a single person born to a life of pure joy and happiness their whole lives. You can choose to make your life happy even in the most down of situations, but at face value it might not be.
The thing is, no matter how popular someone may be, they're just people like you. Once again. We all get lazy sometimes. Even if they are having a perfectly swell day and nothing really is going on, to see 50 comments that you probably should reply to, probably gets pushed back in their mental to-do list. A simple "I'll do that later", or "Pfff, right after I go do ____", becomes 100 messages. And before you know it, you have messages from a week ago that you haven't touched.
Does this sound familiar? This work pattern?
Come on guys admit it. We all procrastinate.
You don't have to tell me that you do. But you know you have. It doesn't have to be holding off a school project until the day before it's due.
It can be telling your mom to "hold on a sec" when you're told to clean your room.
Or even when you know it's lunch-time but you just have to see the latest video uploaded by your favorite Youtuber.
Anything honestly! Anything you push back to do something else you prefer more. That's procrastination.
And on the much larger scale in terms of popularity. As in when they don't reply to your messages in time or at all.
We call that 'change'.
Now I'm not saying everyone remains the same when they get more popularity, so to speak. For the unfortunate individuals who think they're better than us all just because they now have people kissing their feet, and following their every post, those are the people I deem trash. And in reality, they're the ones inferior to you.
Just because they get more attention for what they're good at, as opposed to what you're good at. Does not make them any better than you.
Anyone who doesn't reply because they feel like they're better than you or because your messages are nothing and mean nothing.
Anyone who sees you as 'just another fan' or 'some random supporter' or nobody at all.
That makes them nobody. And they don't deserve your support and comments.
That's just cold-hearted. Cruel. And selfish. And in no circumstances do people who view themselves as superior to the rest of their peers, in no circumstances are they ever superior nor have they ever been, or ever will be.
I hope I never have to witness such a change because it disgusts me.
A more immediate and easy example that I'm sure we all know to be true, is the majority of the celebrity population.
There are always the rare few celebrity individuals who truly are grateful for the support they get and know their place as who they are,
but for all the others that could care less.
They. are. just. trash.
Just because you sing in concerts full of thousands of eager fans, just because you act in movies that are viewed by people worldwide, just because you do something that makes your name appear in the latest headlines of magazines, just because you know people know you. How the heck does that make you any better.
The people who drop off the dollar bills or coins in the donations for causes
the people who think of others and not only their-selves
the people who live not only to fulfill their own lives but to even stop and think about what others may be thinking and going through
the people who don't just think about what they want but what you want
the people who ultimately don't always put themselves first.
Those people are better than any arrogant and cocky celebrity who has it well off in some multi-million dollar mansion in some exotic area of the world.
Now not only are they wasting their money ahem. c:
But when you spend that money on a house you don't need or a new outfit every day.
What are you to the people that give money they need more than you do, to people who need it more.
This is popularity on a big scale. A scale we label as 'stardom'
but hey. What's the difference?
But what I was trying to get at
is that no matter what. You should not feel inferior to someone who has more watchers than you or even does something better than you. Which isn't even necessarily true.
And that also, just because someone is popular, does not mean they changed who they were.
I'm not saying they didn't because as I've just shown, and as we all know too, some do. Not for better usually, but for worse.
But in any event, they're just people like you.
So if they don't reply or talk much, hey! Maybe they have things going on in their lives they don't feel like talking about or even talking to anyone in general.
Maybe they're just procrastinating like you.
Or just being Lazy.
Or really just 'don't feel like it'.
I know. I'm not saying that's acceptable. But it's normal. It's human.
Now I want to make sure this is also clear.
You cannot expect someone to reply to you either given the fact you know all this. Because when you think about it, it's not really shocking if they don't. It's not always because they feel they're better than you or that you don't matter. It could be because of all the reasons I just gave and most of the time I believe it is. At least with online communities such as deviantArt. So on~
I try my best to reply to comments I get on my work, page, and so on. Because I know what it's like to just be that supporting fan or passer-by that just wants to tell you what they feel about your work or you or anything else. And I know what it feels like when you've written something long (or short) and you're eager to see what they say back.
And I know when you draw something for someone, whether it be a commission, request, trade, gift- anything! I know you, no matter what, would love to see what that person you made your work for, what they think of it. And I know as well that comments such as "cute!" or "wow" or "thanks!" can be annoying.
Because of this, it's become a personal reason for me to try my best and reply in a timely fashion and even I admit it gets overwhelming and stressful. But hey! Who am I to complain?
Besides, it was my choice to post my work and get a bigger audience.
But at the same time. I'm no better than you. I know that. And what I make up for in trying to reply to everyone, I lack in trying to make the people I cared for more, feel like they weren't just everyone else. And for those individuals, I'm sorry.
I'm not saying all this so I can ask you to lighten up on me and not hold me accountable for what I could've been but was not, but I just wanted to make it come to attention that maybe the people you expected to be able to reply to everything and the people you automatically thought didn't reply because they just don't care.
Maybe those people really do, and inside they're just having their own stressed out thoughts about how to make it up to you now.
And maybe those people do feel bad for not finding the time to reply to you.
Just for emphasis, I admit myself that sometimes the weight of the responsibilities I have in my life sometimes drive me to the point of near-insanity where I feel like it'd be better if I just quit and left this all.
And so are you.
So why don't we all just take a few minutes trying to understand the other better and slip into those not-so-comfy shoes of someone else?
It's not fun, and I don't do the best job of it either.
But remember? A for effort.
If you can't do, at least try.
And Thank You everyone who read this!
And while I'm at it, thank you too for all the support this whole time! I speak on behalf of myself but maybe also others who haven't found the chance to say this,
but it's meant a lot, every comment I get or favorite, or note, it all does~! :'D And even though it gets busy and unmanageable it seems at times, it's been the most amazing experience just belonging to this community and I know it's never going to be perfect but I feel like I should give a big warm Thank You anyway!
& thanks for reading.
//oops this was long
And I added this last little part after reading a few comments because also:
You can't expect as the fan, that your idol is all-understanding and should be more considerate. But as all you 'populars' reading this, you can't expect your fans to do the same and understand what it's like for you.
It goes both ways! Which is why I believe we both need to take that into consideration and make the effort to understand this and one another :3
But not everyone who's popular is a jerk. Anyone to think so would be unwise to make such generalizations. That's like saying everyone in America speaks english and everyone in china speaks chinese and everyone in Alaska likes the cold or that everyone on dA likes art. Because hey. That's not true.
Not everyone popular is a jerk and that's not to defend myself but to open up the eyes of those who think so.
But amg the biggest thing though, that if it implies to you I'll just admit this because! I know even though some of you guys won't admit it :3 But you know it.
It's not because you don't want fake watchers, or because you don't feel like wasting those points, but I'm sure some of us are proud too in the fact 'we earned these watchers without any help' but hey! I used to have the same attitude about art class and then I went to high school and took it as an elective-- no regrets!